Monday, November 3, 2008

Feminism !



Feminism, is a very interesting concept for me.
all my life i heard phrases like, women's right, feminism and equality. and to tell you the truth I never took the time of day to figure out do i actually believe in that or not. my own personal opinion was a blur. then lately that issue rose to the surface all of a sudden , Maybe it was because of too much Talkshowes that had to fill their airtime with something , or maybe i suddenly was old enough to care, or maybe women just went crazy or maybe it was about time women started talkin about what was rightfully theirs. whatever the reason I suddenly discovered I had an opinion, an opinion that shocks a lot of people who knows me. people around me have this misconception about me as being this independent, wanna-b-American, spoiled brat. I am not a Feminist so that surprise almost everyone around me, except few people who knows me well enough to realize that looks is deceiving.
I Honestly don't see women as in desperate need for help to have their rights. what really bothers me about Arab Feminists, is that a lot of them make couple of stupid mistakes for instance they claim that the "Arab" world is designed to automatically give the man more rights, when it's very evident that this is a GLOBAL issue, they claim that the "Civilized world" has given the women their rights while the fight for women's right is still fought even in America, of course gone is the times of bra burning, but by their own recognition it is still going on. and get me started about their stupid complains about how our society allow men to make some mistakes and denies women those same mistakes and their BIGGEST example is always pr-marital sex, how women are punished for the by death while men get away with it, it's a vaild point but how come every time thye talk about it they comeof as if they just want parents to be cool with their daughters having pre-marital sex instead of wanting partents to raise their sons not to do itreligion is usually their biggest obstacle some choose to get out of this predicament by claiming that the they (sheik and Imams) don't get it right some go as far as claiming that the religion is flawed like of course Nawal el Sadawy, some just ignore the religion all together.

A lot of men would tell you that most feminist are just ugly women who failed in live so they are taking their frustration out on men, I wish i could contradict that but sadly this is the picture that most feminist draw, when they talk you can easily see that they are pushed by merely stubbornness, or bitterness and sometimes even both, most of them refuse to listen to common sense I mean comeon people is it really that important to have women working in EVERY SINGLE JOB, we have to have a female judge, a female Ma2zone, a Female this, a female that! I do believe that some jobs are best preformed by a males some are best preformed by a females.
I also believe that men and women were created different but still equal, I just see equality in a different light. I don't have to be ina male dominate job to feel my equality, hell i don't even have to have a job. it sounds kinda pointless for both men and women to do the same jobs, it's like having a company filled with managers with no emplyees, if both men and women went to work how would raise children? usually anyself respecting feminist would simply tell you, why don't men stay at home and raise children ? and my answer is quite simple because women are better at raising children than men, they have more patients and more nurturing, it's in their nature. it doesn't make them less equal or less then men. We were created on this earth to worship God and to proliferate so raising a family is an imprtant part of our religion , and to raise a family we need a man and a woman. A man protect and a women nurture, it's not a master and slave realationship, it's a partnership and like any other partership ONE has to be in command not 2. Women are married by will, so basically the women gets to chose the man she's gonna live with and follow for the rest of her life, and both of them would follow God's Commands in thier life.
For me it's as simply as that, if you don't like that (as a women) then simply don't get married, (unlike men women are not required to get married in religion).
I am told that this is my view because I've never been to the real world, I've lived in my very own cocoon , a happy family, a privet school , a nice job ,driving my own car and hanging out with friends in cafes and Malls.
Maybe that's right, I don't have any male brothers so maybe I don't know how it feels to be treated as a second grade citizen (as femisits claim happens) but i do believe that this praticular problem which is the only problem I honestly feel for and see, have a very easy solution, instead of goin to talk shows and rallies and assosiations. stay home raise your kids and treat them equally tell your son, you and your sister are alike.
I am sorry but I don't see men as the enemy women are.

11 comments:

Z_Diva said...

YALLALHAWL :D

wana ely knt fakraky zamila, tl3ty 3amila :D

bas howana mesh feminist 100 % bas, ana 3ndy mbda2, in mfesh 7ga esmha u can't do that case u r a girl, NO WAY, girls are strong enough, and capable to be any thing they want, and the most important point is, THEY CAN TAKE CARE OF THEM SELFS.

my life is almost like urs, and never been takin lightly for bein a gurl or watsoever, but i do believe that i donn need a man to make me feel perfect, i don't need a man to enjoy my life, i'm not waiting for a man to start having a life, and by finding a man it will not be the end of my trip.

Z_Diva said...

ah kman as for arab feminists, totaly agree with u, hma mesh fahmeen 7ga asln, we byhrtlo, bas fe nas fel3alm el3rby -7arimat y3ny- m7tagen f3lan y5do 72hm we 7ad ynsfhm, bas elwad3 mesh belshakl elly hma bysawaro, wala el7loul ell3abqrya bt3thm hya elly htnf3 elsitat elly m7tagen msa3da, 5asatan in a3;lb elsetat dol, bykono men tb2a 3;er tb2et elfeminists dol, we 7lolhm el5oza3blya de mesh htfr2 m3 elstat dol :S


sa7ee7 ana keda ab2a eh, feminist, walla mhlabyist ???

Crystal Lobna said...

LOL, mhlabyist '7alesssss

No I really don't think that what we have in the arab world are Feminists I think they are the Mhalabyist, but by the way I don't really feel Like I need a man to save me or even make my life better, but that's maybe cause I've never found Love in my life, but if I did ...... that's a whole different story
and I totally agree with everything else you said :)

Mohammad said...

I think it's all about the woman herself. Dependency is a major turnoff to me el sara7a, in friends even. The problem is: most of the girls I have actually met either in college or out are almost exactly dependant like their mothers, and will marry (at least those who can get a husband) and raise their daughters if they had any as 2nd degree offspring.

I believe in feminism, but in Virgnina Woolf's version.

Crystal Lobna said...

I don't really understand what do you mean by Dependency , financial or emotional ?
and since i've never read anything for Virgnina Woolf you are gonna have to explain her version for me.

Mohammad said...

Dependence means both. Like some girls think that when they get married they shouldn't put a penny into the house eventhough they have a job. Doesn't that sound dependant to u?

As to Woolf, she thought it's one of women's rights to have a room of her own, and so to have a time for her own where she can think and write and have her right of not being disturbed. Isn't that simple enough? Her feminism was more of a personal matter not about jobs or marriage or anything else. What's the use of a woman being judge and whatever else when deep inside her she still have the thought of "belonging" to some male be it a father, brother, husband, or lover?

Crystal Lobna said...

emotional dependency is kinda of a personality flaw, I don't really think it's a gender thing, financial dependency is a social issue, our society gave the women the option not to work but deprived the men from that, I as a person don't really think there is a problem with one partner supporting the other financially, no problem there for me, but I think it's silly of women not to chip in if they have a job, BUT in return it is just as silly for the men not to help in the domestic work load, and since it's hard to find a guy here in egypt who'd help in the house chores, so working women feel that they have all the load on them, although i've seen more women help in the expenses more than I've seen men help in house chores.
so as long as it's not about punishing the women for working by taking away her money it's cool with me.
as about the belonging, I think you meant owned or controlled because i do think that we all like to feel like we belong to someone one way or another, am I right?

Z_Diva said...

nice point vergenia, i always believed that even if one day i fell in love or got married, he must always give me and respect my personal space.

as for lobna's point about Financial dependency, i guess ur right, i have no prob puttin money in my house, but mostly if it's necessary, but if the dear hubby's pocket is chubby, why da hell, i can let him take care of house coasts, like rent bills food etc, and my money is for me, my clothes, books, cds or what so ever i wish for, even if i wish for buyin somethin for the house fine, but just cause i want to, not cause i have to.

batates_777 said...

Hey..I noticed the picture you are holding here "women power " ! I used to hold it too as profile pic "sort of "...which grabbed me to read your post
well, I can say I am a feminist , but nt in away that most think of ! or media made it out !
Feminist is being a woman of rights ,amnot to say equal or less than man ! this is not the issue really ! each has his own rights ..
The thing is : you know your rights and can defend them .
it is okay if you want to stay at home n raise kids,"as long as it is your decision n you not forced to! , n btw this is a hell of job ! n me as a feminist I still say this is one major big role female is here for !
However , if you want to go down , work ,whatever ..you hv the right too! ...

this is applied on everything , and ofcourse religion comes on top or taken into consideration at least for me.
I would say too that we dont hv to follow...we hv brains to think ! once n twice ! so we dont need nawal elsa3dawy or whoever to tell us what to do ?? "though I partially agree with some of Nawals! sure not inc that part which goes beyond religion"!!

again , I hate to generalize, and say arab women , arab men ! whatever really ! there is a problem for sure in the material media is representing ! there is a pb in feminists talks themselves ! but again, we hv brains to see what suits us and decide what to do..we are not here to follow any !!hence, this can be applied on man or woman !
Each has his own rights , and for each there is a role on earth ! some of we hv in common , some we want to share with ! some we need alone ! some we just hate !

Crystal Lobna said...

I feel ashamed to reply your comment right now. I had to re-read my post all comments just to reply to you. after doing all that I look at the date and notice it was almost 4 years ago. So it feel pointless to reply now. so instead i will apologize for not replying . I have kinda abandoned blogging. but I think am back

batates_777 said...

At first I thought you were replying to that other post I just posted a comment to , a poem it was, and up to my surprise when I read your reply , I had to see what was the topic again ! n I scrolled up to see I am talkin about another post now ,quite OLD, I didnt know that I came here before ! :)
It is okay girl :) no need to reply , its nice bumping onto your writings.
Be good :and welcome back )