Thursday, December 8, 2011

The ship that never sinks


Life is radically changed. when you are 29 But one of the everlasting issue that hardly ever change is friendship. you still go through all the silly drama that has been going since the first day you went to KG and called someone your friend for the first time. I suspect that this same drama will be still going on till you the day we die. of course the problems might "seem" different but basically they are the same themes. Jealousy, loyalty , trust, being there when needed. All those issues. Personally I had my share of friends and the theme that always seemed to happen for me again and again was Jealousy. I always have this great friend and then a new person is added to the mix suddenly my close friends starting acting crazy and jealous and usually puts me in a Me or Her type of situation , I fail to make a choice. she get mad I get bored with the drama we seize to be friends. Most girls are Drama Queens, so I always took this things lightly . Lately I was doing a lot of soul searching and I was faced with the question of "how come I get over people super fast?" The thing is when I lose a friend I don't dwell about it I accept it and move on, Personally I've always thought am mature that way. Then I broke up with someone who I was madly in love with ( Long Story for another time) . To everyone's surprise. It took me 2 days to completely get over him. Suddenly Everyone was telling me that I this is not normal and they expected me to crumble and show my deep sadness later. but when I didn't I was accused of being cold , detached and easy to forget people (baya3a).
But am Not!!!! I am a really good friend, Every friend I've ever had marveled about how good friend I am and how whenever they have problems or trouble I am the first person who will be there for them. And that I am God's Gift to friends. Then after the not-so-messy breakup a very close friend of mine came and admitted that she dated that ex behind my back. My reaction! I totally understood her point after all you can't chose who you fall in love with and I held her hand through her own break-up. which she is still suffering of. I really wish her well and I am now a closer friend to her then before. but I have to admit that I am still prone to jealousy when I hear about how he was better boyfriend to her then he was to me, because I deserved better then that.but I don't even tell her that I sound like an amazing friend , right!!
7 years ago I stopped talking to a one of the closest friends I've had for 12 years, because she broke-off her engagement to my cousin with out telling me and the following day when we met she acted like nothing was wrong. I guess my point is just that friendship is a messy business , P.s I have a distinct feeling that I lost my ability to write, but that might be just a little rust. so sorry if you found this post less then satisfying.
Somewhat inspirted from this post for batates_777

9 comments:

Polka Dotted said...

ARE YOU ME ?? :D
well the drama never ends indeed.

that's why I choose a guy when I look for a close friend (until the situation changes and one of us likes the other and the drama starts)...

Girls are untrustable, plus the jealousy as u said... but I can hardly bare any PMSing anymore...

"how come I get over people super fast?" (said the girl who broke off her engagement 4 days ago and totally over the whole thing--- ME) :D

friendship is messy... I decided no more drama, live day by day, stay with whomever make u feel young and appreciated.

LOVE YOUR BLOG

Crystal Lobna said...

Such a relief to know that am not alone, they say misery loves company.
Glad you Like the Blog.

insomniac said...

ok first things first:

teach me how to quickly detach and get over people, i am in DIRE need of that!!!!

second of all:

you are who you choose to believe, and it's both a blessing and a curse...

third of all:

people who give ultimatums (me or her/him) are usually insecure... now you can either indulge their insecurity by responding to their ultimatums, or move on... i personally do the first because as i mentioned, i lack the ability to move on and when someone matters, it's most important for me to please them... bas hat3aleg

hah, hat3alemeeny emta???

Crystal Lobna said...

I wish it was teachable, kont 3almt every girl i know. for me it's like a switch, one day it was set to "madly in love would do anything to please" then the following day it was set to "Whatever ,totally don't care". To try to describe what goes through my head: just the simple fact that this person no longer care about my feelings ( not trying to make me happy or deliberately try to hurt me) makes me feel like there is no need to care about them , they don't deserve the privilege of my existence

Brownie said...

I have never have a real closet friend, I had good close friend bas not that close to tell them how many breathes I took until recently & it is somehow awful, I tell her that even my future husband wont be as jealous as she is..
I miss having secrets but am grateful to have her though =)

Crystal Lobna said...

as detached as I am, I've always have a real close friend who will tell me how many breath she takes, while i only tell her O yeah of course I too breath. I know it's unfair, but I've never been comfortable with sharing my inner feelings and secrets. and now I fail miserably when I try to do that.
I always tell people around me I don't mean 80% of the things I say, funny thing is they don't know how true this statement really is

batates_777 said...

I just read that ! and I too wish if you can teach me someday how to get over ppl n move on easily ! i badly need that !!!!!!
I think I am totally the opposite ! I am all stuck in memories and with ppl I met and never here anymore !
I ever thought it has smth to do with my character , and that I wish if I can make anything / any relationship just ideal ! but the fact is ! there is not !! and me myself is not even perfect !!
back to my post vs yours , wold show clearly how am still attached to those friends who left me long ago n how good you did by detaching them !
i wish i can do that sometime!
i truly do.

Clavicula Nox said...

This.. this is very sweet...

Crystal Lobna said...

Thanx Clavicula Nox Glad you like it